Softly Spoken~

Stay with me, my beloved husband.
Don’t leave me.
I don’t want to be without you in this life.
Words uttered only in my heart as my hand gently touched your forehead.
As my hand glided over your cheekbones, sharpened by cancer.
As my two hands wrapped around your fingers, stroking your knuckles. 733925_10152250642650400_2024366887_n
Remembering the strength of your hand wrapped around mine in our lifetime together.
As your spirit slowly faded away from me.
Rest easy, my Love.
Thank you for loving me.
Thank you for showing me how to love.
I will always remember you.
I will make sure that every person I ever meet from here on
Will hear your name from my lips.
Hear who you were to me.
Who I was to you,
And who we were to each other.
I will always remember you.
I’ll always be okay.
I promise.
Just let yourself rest, my beloved.
You are loved.
Slip away when it’s time for you to go.
It’s okay for you to go.
You are loved.
Eyes filled with Love as lips spoke these words aloud.
How could I wish for you to linger on when you were so spent?
So I spoke words that I hoped you would hear even as you traveled on without me.
Words to reassure you,
Words that shattered my heart, 12932923_1006554602732807_3717615266670319827_n
As the very air around us changed and Time ticked minutes and then seconds,
And sacred beauty filled the room,
Even as tears fell.
Where are you, my beloved?
Where did you go?
I don’t know where you are.
You know where I am.
Come find me.
I will wish you into being, as I travel on without you.
Perhaps if I yearn desperately enough for you,
You will return…
Stay with me, my beloved husband.
Don’t ever leave me.
I can’t bear to be without you.
Place your hands upon my shoulders.
Wrap your left behind Love around me.
Let your spirit shine within me. IMG_1745
Let your Love beat strongly in my own heart
Add it to the Love I had for you,
And let our combined Love shimmer and shine so extravagantly
That the world must stop in wonder and awe.
Be with me, my beloved husband,
As I live on, for both of us.
I love you.
I was loved by you.
I carry you with me and within me.
Your Love, my Love, our Love, is my armor. 33384992_1687491431305784_6535730087411580928_n
Chuck Dearing
April 21, 2013
11:21 pm

Leaving NJ moments-

Leaving NJ was surprisingly difficult and the tears have been only a moment away all day–not leaving the house so much, tho there were some quick run-throughs in my mind of our good times there.  Leaving my beautiful gardens…tough one there, but I took plenty of pictures of them.  It was in that house that I found out what I was made of, and in that house that I started and ran Tapestries of Hope.  And what a strong community of women it has been–and will continue to be.  Its in good hands and will grow and meet the needs of many more daughters in the South Jersey area.

goodbye, front of our house!

In a hotel now–it wasn’t too bad a ride here to Harrisburg area.  Had some rain for awhile, but the truck held up well.  We have WAY too much stuff! When we get to IN, I think I’m going to go through things again, and filter more out.  How can two people have so much when they have already gotten rid of so much?  Its only a truck full, and a smallish truck at that, but still way too much!  The keyword to our lives now is simplify, simplify, simplify!  Its about the people in my life, not the material goods.

This mactop is still very new to me, so I’m going to see if I can load some pictures to it from today.  More later, need to chill!

Welcome to our backyard!

My mom’s garden

my brother Kysa’s garden